So there’s a large crab apple tree in my backyard. Soolin and I are in the habit of playing fetch after I work out every day, and normally I stand at the foot of the tree and toss the ball the length of the yard. Two days ago we start playing and after a few fetches, all the sudden Soolin starts doing the doggie version of the funky chicken, writhing about and rubbing her snout furiously. As this is happening, I discover my hair is full of something and it’s moving. It dawns on me that somehow we are now in the midst of a swarm of very pissed off yellow jackets and they are stinging the crap out of poor Soolin. I go into full panic mode ‘COME!’ I shout as I book off towards our barn. We scoot in and I pull the sliding door shut behind us. Soolin is still FULL of bees, they’ve crawled in under her coat and are slithering about trying to get at her to sting. Fortunately there is a pair of leather gloves right there so I pull one on and proceed to try combing the bees out of her hair – all told I get 6 or 7, with occasional pauses to battle other bees who either got in the barn before I pulled the door shut or have taken off her to attack me.

Amazingly I was only stung once, and it was really minor. Soolin took a complete beating though, the left side of her face swelled up so much her eye was mostly closed. To make matters worse, the next day my neighbor took the dogs to play in the yard while I worked out, and 10 minutes later HE came running into the barn in a panic. A slightly less awful version of the same deal had gone down, and he’s allergic to bee stings. So now we’re trying to figure out how the hell to get rid of these bees. They see the crab apple tree and the surrounding area as their territory and go ballistic if you get close. They nest underground which is most likely how the surprised me so completely, and why they went after Soolin more than me (she’s closer to the ground). I should mention that Soolin’s fine – her face was back to normal by the morning and yesterday when she got stung I gave her a benadryl. Wish me luck – this weekend I go to battle with the damned things.